barya

they used to tell me i was building a dream,
and so i followed the mob,
when there was earth to plow, or guns to bear,
i was always there right on the job.
they used to tell me i was building a dream,
with peace and glory ahead,
why should i be standing in line, just waiting for bread?

once i built a railroad, i made it run,
made it race against time
once i built a railroad, now it's done
brother, can you spare a dime?
once i built a tower, up to the sun,
brick, and rivet, and lime
once i built a tower, now it's done
brother, can you spare a dime?

once in khaki suits, gee we looked swell,
full of that yankee doodly dum,
half a million boots went slogging through hell,
and i was the kid with the drum
say, don't you remember, they called me al
it was al all the time.
why don't you remember, i'm your pal?
buddy, can you spare a dime?

romany

after a quick glance around the blogzorz,
i noticed that it's been about 2 months since my last real post
[i enjoy posting lyrics, but that's a cheap cop–out and doesn't count]
so, instead of posting yet another song for you to [not] listen to,
i'll just talk about music instead, specially my music collection
because I'M SO GODDAMN BORED I HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DO

[this post is brought to you by the above theme]

because i've had little to nothing to do these past three months,
i've had to resort to making my own entertainment
most of my waking time has been devoted to the following activities:
listening to music, surfing the internet, playing flash games, occasionally reading,
and filling out job applications [and drinking tea]
pros of that: it's a great change of pace from the past two/three semesters
cons: i'm not paid to do any of that, i have no car, and no money

so because i've been in my house alone for the past quarter–year,
i've been strapped for things to accomplish
[quick understanding of the way my mind works:
if i'm not getting something done, i feel inordinately guilty for wasting time
it doesn't have to be big or meaningful, it just has to be something]
and i've started doing trivial things to give myself something to do
i rearranged my house's first floor [kitchen/living room/sitting room]
i chopped a metric shit–tonne of wood and kindling,
and [weather permitting] done yard work when necessary
but as useful as those things are,
they're one–and–dones, so there's no follow up or continuous attention needed
so i'm back to square one once they're done
which is how i got on my current kick

once i was finally done with school work and no longer in need of all my files,
i cleaned out my classwork folder from the past 4 1/2 years,
and got all that shit organized, lest i need it again at some point in the future
i would've left it at that, but i came across a horrifying realization that same day:
my hard drive was almost full
my 350gb hard disk, a full 875% more space than my previous laptop had,
was down to its last 800 megabytes
i was completely flummoxed, so i did the one thing i could do:
i started swearing aloud at my computer,
and then i started swearing at myself

since that day, i've gone on a space–saving binge of unmatched proportion
i've delved into all my files and documents, photo albums, and movie folders,
trimming corners and downsizing file sizes where possible,
deleting things i no longer liked/wanted in an attempt to regain some breathing room
most of the space i regained came from my massive movie folder,
since each movie i had was ~700mb, and i deleted about a dozen of them
[except for one movie file, which is grotesquely large and unendingly cumbersome
i'm lookin' at you, history of the devil, all 30.65 gigs of you]
i got myself some spatial breathing room
now i'm down to the movies i like and the movies i want to watch,
as opposed to those plus movies i didn't like, hadn't watched, or didn't want to
but it was downsized nonetheless
but even in the face of all this bulemic bit shit going down like a sweet muffin,
[archaic inside joke, anyone?]
there was one behemoth left untouched, unscathed, and daring me to touch it:
my music library

blogasaurs, my crippling music addiction is both well–documented and unashamed,
but it's time i gave you some numbers to quantify my melodic slavery:
at the start of 2012, my music totaled 90.72 gigs, 15102 songs, and >1038 1/2 hours
it was the product of years of musical attrition starting in august of 2003,
subject to every musical whim i've had since then,
from wanton free itunes downloads, to ganking friends' burned cds,
to shameless mass downloading, to other's massive music collections,
to my own selfish musical hoarding
i'm like the old guy who never throws away newspapers,
like the lady who adopts every cat she finds,
like the people who keep making lolcats
i must have every good piece of music ever made
which is how i ended up with such a leviathan parasite on my hard drive

that was two weeks ago, and i have made serious strides in slaying the fell beast
i've been nothing short of ruthless in culling my music,
deleting everything from albums i was tepid about, to songs i no longer liked,
to shit i never even bothered listening to
it's been a long, ongoing [i'm actually doing it as i type this]
and man is it making all the difference
my itunes is less cluttered, my playlists aren't as bloated,
and there's far less music i don't like on my computer
at current count, i'm down to 84.42 gigs, 14243 songs, ~954 hours,
and the culling ain't over yet
i wouldn't be surprised to see another 6 gigs hit the recycle bin before i'm done
because nothing comes between me and my music, especially my music


i realize i sound like some sort of inspiration weight–loss jagoff about this,but i have to sap every bit of meaning i can from this
remember: i have nothing to do and no one to hang out with
if i can clean up/out my hard drive, it'll at least distract me from being in the mount
besides, i take pride in my musical taste and organization
[as anyone who has seen what i do to my next music can attest to],
and it's high time i get rid of the shit that doesn't deserve to have me listen to it

besides, if i don't clear out enough space,
how am i supposed to keep up with all the new cds that are coming out?
that shit's not gonna catalogue and listen to itself

nalěćo

it's the first day of spring, and my life is starting over again
the trees grow, the river flows, and its water will wash away my sins
for i do believe that everyone has one chance to fuck up their lives
but like a cut-down tree i will rise again,
and i'll be bigger and stronger than ever before

there's a hope in every new seed and every flower that grows upon the earth
and though i love you and you know that, well i no longer know what that's worth
but i'll come back to you in a year or so, and i'll rebuild, be ready to become
oh, the person you believed in, oh, the person that you used to love

for i'm still here hoping that one day you may come back

ströddes

been climbing trees, i've skinned my knees
my hands are black, the sun is going down
she scruffs my hair in the kitchen steam
she's listening to the dream i weaved today

crosswords through the bathroom door,
while someone sings the theme tune to the news
and my sister buzzes through the room,
leaving perfume in the air
and that's what's triggered this

a high–back chair, he sits and stares,
a thousand yards and whistles marching band
kneeling by and speaking up,
he reaches out and i take a massive hand

disjointed tales that flit between
short trousers and a full dress uniform,
and he talks of people ten years gone
like i've known them all my life,
like scattered black and whites

i come back here from time to time,
i shelter here somedays

fallout

so guess what?
it's sunday night, and the final regular season bcs rankings are out
know what that means?
yup: MORE FOOTBALL RANTING
[seryusly, if you guys aren't sick of it yet, than you never will be
which means i may as well just make it happen more often]

first off, let me proffer some organization for my decidedly unorganized thoughts
i'm gonna bitch about the weird as fuck rankings,
then i'm gonna bitch about the bowl selections,
then i'm gonna bitch about the bcs
cool? cool. so let's get to it

right off the bat,
it becomes extremely obvious that the bcs absolutely hates non–aq teams
and thus relishes punishing them
case in point: the until–yesterday unbeaten houston cougars
they were ranked #6 last week when they played the #24 souther miss golden eagles,
and then houston proceeded to lose to them. badly. [by 21 points]
so where's the problem?
the bcs dropped them THIRTEEN places to #19 in this week's bcs
and southern miss? they got a bump ALL THE WAY up to #21
how fucking bullshit is that?
by comparison, georgia was #14 when they lost to lsu, and are now ranked #16
msu was #13 when they lost to wisconsin, and are now #17
va tech was #5 when the lost to clemson, and now they are #11
oh, and btdubs, oklahoma was #10 when they lost by 34 FUCKING POINTS to osu
and now, they're all the way down to #14
believe me when i say i could go on and on
i'm not arguing that houston doesn't deserve to drop spots for their loss,
nor do i believe they are less deserving because they play in a [relatively] weaker conference,
i'm arguing that the bcs is complete and utter horseshit when it comes to non–aq teams
how does southern miss only move up by three when they knocked off the #6 team?
how does houston drop 13 spots by losing to a ranked team?
i can GUARANTEE you, if lsu had lost to georgia by 3 tds yesterday,
that they'd still be in the top 5
so let's just take that wool off our eyes and admit it ourselves and the world:
if you aren't an sec team, the bcs won't like you and will underrate you
if you aren't an automatic–qualifying team, fuck you go die in a fire
and that is our supposedly unbiased, fair, computerized ranking system

oh, and by the way
there are four 9–win teams in the top 25 [the highest one, baylor, is #12]
and there are only two teams that have 12+ wins
one is the current #1, lsu, at 13–0; the other, houston, is #19 at 12–1
ready for the real kicker?
there are two [TWO!] 7–5 teams in the latest bcs top 25
texas [24] and auburn [25]
how does THAT not scream bias?
texas shot itself in the foot yesterday at home by 24 points to baylor,
and auburn got destroyed [28 points] by alabama two weeks ago
they were both ranked in the low 20s last week,
so how in fuck's name are they still included in the top 25?
texas has lost to every ranked team they've played this year
and auburn beat one [south carolina] in week 5
and just to put the cherry on top of this particular bullshit sundae,
arkansas moved up 2 places after NOT EVEN PLAYING this week,
[by virtue of the fact that their blowout to lsu had them slip only five spots to #8]
which means they got rewarded for other teams losing,
solely because they got preferential treatment in the first place

and now, to the bowl games,
because i can't believe this shit
first up, our nc game: lsu and alabama
i simply refuse to believe that alabama is better than oklahoma state
i flat out deny that line of thinking
yes, alabama's only loss was to lsu, whereas ok state's sole loss was to unraked iowa state
BUT, ok state has a MUCH more productive offense than alabama
and they've played arguably just as tough of a slate as the crimson tide
more importantly, they finished the season stronger than the tide did
you could even make the argument that stanford would make an equally strong #2
what it comes down to for me, though, is the hypocrisy of punishment
do you remember how many spots alabama dropped from their lsu loss? just 2 [to #4]
how many spots did oregon fall with their loss to lsu? 10 [#3 to #13]
how many did arkansas fall? 5
how about west virginia? 6
florida? over 8 [#17 to out of the bcs]
i don't care if alabama's loss to lsu was closer than anyone else's
in this case, a loss is a loss, and they aren't treated with any kind of congruity
which means the sport's media's darling sec west gets yet another national title
while ok state is left with the fiesta bowl [though that is a good consolation prize]

and while we're on the subject of bowls,
how the hell did boise state end up in such a shitty bowl game?
it's not like they're ranked #7 at 11–1 that started with a win over #19 georgia
i understand that they didn't win the mountain west this year [tcu did]
but the fact that they're stuck playing a 7–5 arizona state is ludicrous
especially since the sun devils have dropped four straight games to weak teams
boise should be playing a strong big ten or big 12 team
like nebraska, penn state, oklahoma, or baylor
they should return their bowl game for a full refund and get an upgrade
and speaking of bowl games with TERRIBLE teams,
how about this year's kraft fight hunger bowl,
which has the must–see matchup of 6–6 illinois and 6–7 ucla
two of the most embarrassing teams that bothered playing this year
seriously, illinois has lost six straight games and fired its head coach,
along with being the laughing stock of the entire big ten
[seriously, even indiana and minnesota are more respected right now]
and ucla? the team that had to get a special waiver to play a bowl with a losing record?
[for the record, how is that a thing? bowl games are for winner who deserve it
ucla, you are most definitely not a winner, and you do not deserve a bowl
i don't give a flying fuck if you "won" the pac12 south,
you've given up 99 points in the past two games, and only scored 31
no right–minded indvidual would ever reward you for that hideous performance]
i dunno about the rest of you,
but of all the boring bowl games i'll be actively ignoring this month,
that one will be at the top of the list

all that being said, there are some bowls to look forward to this month
and though there are some that i'll be more interested in watching than others,
here's my list of bowls worth watching:
–nevada v. souther miss [sheraton hawai'i, 12/24]
–louisvile v. nc state [belk, 12/27]
–florida state v. notre dame [champs sports, 12/29]
–washington v. baylor [valero alamo]
–iowa v. oklahoma [insight]
–northwestern v. texas a&m [meineke]
–virginia v. auburn [chick–fil–a]
–houston v. penn state [ticketcity]
–msu v. georgia [outback]
–nebraska v. south carolina [capital one]
–kansas state v. arkansas [cotton]
–smu v. pittsburgh [bbva compass]
it seems like a short list [at least to me],
but with a lack of bcs bowls, it's gonna be a little bit paltry
speaking of bcs bowls...

an open letter to the bcs:
dear bcs, my name is ben and i'm an avid college football fan.
i spend all year impatiently waiting for football to finally begin,
and look forward to bowl season like a 6 year old looks forward to christmas.
this year, though, christmas will seem a little less magical thanks to you.
you've grinched me out of quality national championship game,
just as you've given me 'unbiased' formulaic rankings for the past 8 weeks [and 13 years].
you've tried to tell me that my conference, the big ten, just isn't good enough,
and have consistently screwed us out of fair rankings for our most quality teams.
i'd say i feel alone in that, but unfortunately the big ten isn't the only one to feel this way:
i imagine the acc and pac12 have quite the bone to pick you, not to mention the big 12.
and even though you've put me through this for more years than i'd care to remember,
this year finally feels like you've taken it too far.
i've seen good teams go underrated and underranked this entire season,
and i've seen incredibly overrated teams be unfairly highly ranked for long stretches of time.
so, i say to you, for all to see, that i'm done with your bullshit.
i'm declaring an all–encompassing boycott on the bcs for the foreseeable future.
i will not watch the national championship, the fiesta, sugar, or orange bowls,
and as much as it pains me to do so, i will not be watching the rose bowl.
i refuse to go along with your charade any longer.
even if, in the coming years, my team manages to win it all and play in the rose bowl,
i will not be watching them, because of you,
and i encourage the fanbases of teams you've spurned to do the same.
the only thing that has proven influential over you is money, ratings, and attendance,
and i steadfastly refuse to provide you with any of them.
so go ahead, give the sec west their sixth straight national championship.
go ahead and give undeserving teams bcs bowls and deserving teams the cold shoulder.
go ahead and claim objective superiority with your computerized formulas.
you overshadow on–field accomplishments with off–the–field choices,
you've created way more controversy than support in the past 13 years,
you've been accused of virtually every impropriety known to american law,
and yet you still claim superiority over the rest of us.
i'm done giving you that satisfaction, and i'm done with you.
please, stop ruining college football for me and my fellow fans,
and let us get back to enjoying the games without your nonsense hovering over our heads.

malefic

guess what time it is?
if you guessed "...fuck, not more football",
put on the crown, today you're the king
the college football regular season is almost officially over,
so what better way to celebrate than hardcore raging?
it is, after all, what you've come to expect from me
so why deny you all that you've come to love and cherish

first up, fired coaches
you've gotta hand it to athletic directors these days
they've got to be some of the most efficient people on the face of the earth
three coaches were confirmed fired before noon on sunday, NOON
that's some pretty quick decision making
really, ads? couldn't even get through the weekend before making announcements?
what happened to announcing that shit on monday morning?
christ, at least give the coach you're firing a day to clear out his desk
btdubs, for those that are wondering,
the three coaches are ron zook [illinois], turner gill [kansas], and larry porter [memphis]
at the moment, those are the only three that are confirmed
and OH BOY, are there a shit ton more on their way
if following college football has taught me anything,
it's to expect double digit coach firings in the two weeks after the season ends
and we've started the carousel srong this year with a nice trifecta
who's next, i wonder?

i'm not one to normally speculate on the future of coaches
mostly because i find it pedantic and usually pretty mean–spirited
[these are, after all, people, and regardless of how you feel about them,
they deserve a modicum of respect and dignity, even in being fired]
but man oh man, this year's projected slate is MASSIVE
from all i've been able to garner from at least quasi–credible sources,
[and yes, espn, that absolutely includes you]
here's the 'possibly fired/hotseat' coaches list:
4 from the big 12, 2 from the big east, 3 from the b1g
4 from conference usa, 3 from mac, 2 from mountain west, 4 from pac12,
3 from sec, 2 from sun belt, and 2 from wac
that, ladies and gents, is a full 29 coaches
29 men with the massive media spotlight shining right in their eyes
surely that many people don't deserve to be fired
so how about we just collectively chill the hell out, hmm?
i'm sure the school will fill us in very soon
[since they are loathe to wait so long]

and since everyone else is blowing up the interwubs with it,
this is my two cents on urban meyer:
urban, you're being an ass
if you think florida was stressful and detrimental to your health,
then you ain't seen nothin' yet
how could ohio state possibly be any less stressful than that?
also, i hope your girls and wife enjoyed the past 11 months with you,
cuz they'll probly never see you again
so much for being a family man and spending more quality time with them, eh?
please, do me and the rest of the big ten a favor:
actually spend some time with your family, look after yourself,
and fuck's sake, stay the hell out of my conference

in other football news,
my b1g champsionship prediction is half wrong, much to our collective chagrin
[thanks a lot, penn state, for proving me SUPER WRONG
maybe it was your succesful wildcat plays last week at ohio state,
but i believed you could kick ass on the road
guess last year wasn't an offensive fluke after all]
i gotta say, i'm not nearly as excited as everyone else about this rematch
first off, i'm not a fan of post–season rematchs of regular–season games
they just aren't as enjoyable as the first time around,
and they tend to get WAY over–hyped [case in point, '97 sugar bowl]
plus, who wants to see the same game twice in one season?
college football's season is already short enough,
why cheapen it with rematches?
secondly, i wanted a match up with penn state SO BAD
that would've a great goddamn game
the big ten's two best defenses going head to head on a neutral field?
i'd watch that so hard ALL DAY LONG
and what self–respecting team could pass up the chance to play penn state?
seryusly, i'd take them over wisconsin any day

secondly, and this is related,
am i really going to have to put up with this 'msu's inferior' bullshit AGAIN?
how fucking stupid and/or blind are you people?
beyond the fact that msu has TWICE derailed wisconsin's perfect season dreams,
they've played better on the road than wisconsin has
consider:
msu has beaten ohio state, iowa, and northwestern on the road
wisconsin has beaten illinois and minnesota on the road
msu has the league's top–ranked defense, wisconsin the top–ranked offense
there is no plausible way you can say that either team is superior
they're virtually even as far as talent and on–field performance
yes it'll be a hard–fought game, and yes msu might lose
but to count msu out before it begins is foolish to the point of idiocy
might i remind all of you that msu was counted out of the 10/22 game?
might i remind you that msu wasn't predicted to win the legends division?
and might i remind i remind you that both of those were proven wrong?
so please, give credit where credit is due
and admit that wisconsin will meet its match in indianapolis
because it will, and i'm gonna watch every second of it

finally, a message to michigan football:
thank you, thank you, thank you
thanks for finally giving me a michigan team i can root for
thank you for FINALLY ending that ridiculous streak against ohio state
and thanks for helping the state of michigan to its most successful b1g season ever
it was about fucking time you guys played like a michigan team,
and not some pansy half–southern whining spread–offense–running sons o' bitches
remember how i said that michigan playing well makes msu better too?
well, i'm glad you took it to heart
you guys actually played like you wanted to win, and then did it
[i bet a few of you had forgotten what that felt like]
too bad you hadn't thought to get brady hoke four years ago, eh?
at any rate, congrats on a stellar season, and good luck in your bowl game
[p.s.—if/when msu wins the b1g championship on saturday,
i hope you guys get the bcs at–large bid,
that way the b1g's bcs contingent is pure michigan
i could totally live with that]

chamkar leu

[this first paragraph is brought to you by shamelessselfpromotion.com™]
this month holds two notable events for zis blog:
—this particular post is number 300, making it officially the longest blog i've kept
—i got 1000 pageviews in one month [way to go, october]
i'd say i feel like i've broken into the bigtime, but i know i haven't
i probly just got more visitors due to the INSANE amount of links i posted
so worry not blogasaurs,
my humility and modesty is intact

[after writing that,
i'm REALLY tempted to call you readers blogasaurs
but i shall resist, because i need not label you
however, if ever there is a reference to 'blogasaurs' in the future
you'll know what i'm refering to]


i realize that most of my recent posts have been ranty and opinionated
and while it's not an inaccurate description of me in my normal state,
i need to break it up some in order to keep it from getting old hat
so not ranty opinions today, folks
just a long and unabbreviated status update

i've hit crunch time with my thesis,
in that i have just about one calendar month to get it done
i'm not stressing about it [not yet, at least]
but i am kind of excited for it
i'm interested to see how i put all these ideas together on paper
and what kind of argument i'll actually be making
[i know the basics, for the record,
but i dunno how their gonna manifest into an overall milieu]
i got a hold of a few more interesting books and documents
so hopefully they'll prove useful instead of a time waster
but it's at the point where i need to spend more time writing
which is gonna be a fun roller coaster of productivity and procrastination
[like my normal writing process,
only with more at stake]
let's see how the month shakes out, shall we?

in other news,
carter roommate brought up a great point last night:
how am i gonna get my mass effect 3 fix come march?
seeing as how i am sans xbox 360, tv, and likely me3
dear god do i hope i have some sort of job come january
cuz damn, i dunno how i'm gonna make it without
especially since MAX PAYNE FUCKING 3 comes out in march too
it's gonna be tough going if i don't have access to it
[this is where i'd put in an obnoxious hashtag reference]

also?
there was a disheartening lack of costumes on campus today
i dunno why, especially since past halloweens have had plenty of costumes
but this year there was a notable lack
maybe it was because halloween was on a monday this year
but seryusly, WAY TO FAIL MSU STUDENTS
i felt like such a standout with my opie cut on
[approximation of what i look like here and here]
especially sitting in the law library all afternoon
but you know what?
it's fucking halloween, and i'll do as i damn well please

ntorcia

well i need something to soothe this pain
to cool the love you pumped through my veins
cuz i'm burnin', i'm burnin' up for you

and i need somethin' to quench this fire
before it becomes a funeral pyre
yeah i'm burnin' with yearnin' so much for you

your love's a drug i have to drop
it hurts me so much, but i just can't stop,
i can't stop burnin' i'm yearning so much, for you

you struck the sparks
you fire the flames in me
and now my heart's a blazin' ruin
you say that you were only foolin'

don't walk away, don't do me wrong
don't leave me this way, singing this torched song
don't leave me burnin', i'm burnin' up for you

شنگرفی

she seems dressed in all the rings
of past fatalities
so fragile, yet so devious
she continues to see
climatic hands that press her temples and my chest
enter the night that she came home... forever

she is everything and more...
the solemn hypnotic
my dahlia, bathed in possession, she is home to me
i get nervous, perverse, when i see her it's worse
but the stress is astounding
it's now or never, she's coming home... forever

oh... she's the only one that makes me sad

hard to say what caught my attention
fixed and crazy... aphid attraction
carved my name in my face to recognize
such a pheromone cult to terrorize

i'm a slave and i am a master
no restraints and unchecked collectors
i exist through my needs to self–oblige
she is something in me that i despise

i won't let this build up inside of me!

she isn't real, i can't make her real

she seemed dressed in all of me,
stretched across my shame
all the torment and the pain
leaked through and covered me
i'd do anything to have her to myself,
just to have her for myself
now i don't know what to do,
i don't know what to do when she makes me sad

she is everything to me
the unrequited dream,
the song that no one sings,
the unattainable
she's a myth that i have to believe in
all i need to make it real is one more reason
i don't know what to do
i don't know what to do when she makes me sad

but i won't let this build up inside of me
a catch in my throat,
choke, torn into pieces,
i won't, no, i don't want to be this
but i won't let this build up inside of me

she isn't real, i can't make her real

classism

as you science–minded readers may be aware,
there is a little thing called the periodic table

each of the different colors represents a different kind of element

[blues are alkali/alkaline metals, yellows are transitional metals, etc]

and it are lookin' a little something like this:

now, something clever people like to do is riff on the idea of the periodic table
there's the queeriodic table, the periodic table of the internet,
the periodic table of vulgarity, the periodic table of typefaces,
the periodic tables of beer, marketing, meat, irrational nonsense,
and, of course, the periodic tables of /b/, memes, sex, and final fantasy
but, in all the wit, pith, and downright inanity,
i felt there was something missing,
something direly important and fulfilling
and so, i present you with…
THE CLASSIST PERIODIC TABLE


Alkali/Alkaline metals [blue] — Old Money
these metals have been around longer than anyone
so long, in fact, they can't remember who first acquired their leviathan wealth
potassium has at least three yachts, a couple family mansions,
and you have the misfortunate of knowings about their insufferable children,
[cesium and francium, who is just SO rare she's a princess, don't ya know]
they constantly and consistently talk about themselves in glowing verbosity
while considering anyone with less than half their wealth to be 'riff raff'
they NEVER associate with the commoners, i.e. the other metals
don't bother themselves with pedantic exercises like academia, politics, and the like
all they are concerned about is marrying their own status/more money/both
[little known fact: the entire 'unun' series is magnesium and radium's inbred spawn]
and making sure they have as few neighbors as possible
[because how are you supposed to be untouchable with those miscreants nearby?]


Lanthanides/Actinides [gray] — the Nouveau Riche
these folk are, if possible, even more insufferable pricks than the old money
lanthanum's a self–made man [which is as close to arsenic as a phrase can come],
which means there was a time it and actinium weren't filthy rich
so to make up for this obvious shortcoming,
and to completely bury their working class backgrounds
[they were originally transitional metals, as you can tell by their position]
they make themselves out to be even older money than the old money
which, of course, is a ruse you can see through in a second
[old money refuses to associate with them:
ytterbium and curium got wasted at one of sodium's high–society shindigs once,
and tried to gangbang strontium in the wine cellar
ever since then, they've been prohibited from inhabiting official table space]
the only reason they have their wealth in the first place is thanks to nuclear physics:
uranium, neptunium, and plutonium had to go be all important and shit
and so now we're stuck with lazy, egregious extended family living vicariously


Transition Metals [yellow] – the Proletariat
these poor bastards have the unfortunate distinction of being the working class
the serfs, the indentured servants, the slaves, the downtrodden, the immigrants
NO ONE likes them, and no one thinks they work hard enough
[even though tungsten, iron, cobalt, and nickel more than pull their own weight]
these are the elements left to prop up the rest of the table, especially the gases
[especially those cocksucking nonmetals, the arrogant pricks]
though gold and platinum have been basically deciding the currency rate for years,
they're constantly looked down on because of their salt–of–the–earth origins
[if there's one thing the alkali/nes absolutely CANNOT abide,
it's coming out of the dirt in a nugget]
in spite of their superior numbers, and great organizational abilities,
the transitions will never be able to improve their lot
the most they've ever gained is their association with the post–transitions,
[and let me tell you, aluminium threw a bitch fit about that one,
though tin and lead finally got it to come around,
after they all got squared away, they threw an EPIC bender to celebrate
the rabble always finds solace in booze, it seems]
so, despite doing more than their fair share, and actually being quite valuable
the transitionals will always and forevermore catch shit from everyone else
especially the…


Metalloids [green] — the Middle Class 
[for clarification's sake, i don't mean this in the sense of the American middle class
i mean this in the sense of being between the proletariat and upper classes]
now these guys, the metalloids, are the cocksuckers that NOBODY likes
they're always the ones telling the transitionals what to do and when
dictating orders like shop foremen and acting like their better than them
antimony especially incites rabid hatred amongst pretty much everyone,
[mostly due to the ongoing debate about how to pronounce its fucking name]
boron really gets the transitional's goat because he's perched on top of aluminium,
acting all superior and looking at the transitionals like he's their master
[and yeah, there's a reason he's on top of aluminium
that greedy bastard'll do anything to get into high society]
the only one the transitionals will never try to cross is silicon,
because he's the one who can outsource all their jobs
and while life may suck now, it'd suck even more without shit to do


Nonmetals [orange] — the Upper Class
now these are the assholes that the metals AND metalloids hate
these are the bastards who own things and take the moral/societal high ground
they were blessed with 'different' uses than their metallic counterparts,
and they lord it over them as though it was just fate that made it this way
oxygen and nitrogen think their necessity renders them certain stations in life,
and thus need to be 'cared for' because they are, after all,
SO busy with all the work they need to care for
phosphorous and sulphur, on the other hand, are just fat and lazy
they're the gross fucks who don't mind doing pedantic work to get richly rewarded
the metals detest everything they stand for,
and the metalloids, who will always try to shirk their metallic heritage,
desperately try to join them or become them
[which is why the metals will always hate them more]
they'll never get pissed at carbon, though
he was the one from the ghetto who actually made it,
through years of extremely hard work and great opportunity, he actually made it
the metalloids hate him because of it, but the transitionals adore him for it
and it gives them just a sliver of hope that maybe, just maybe,
it'll happen for them too


Noble Gases/Halogens [red] – the Bourgeoisie
these power–hungry fuckers are at the top of the elemental food chain
they own everything, control everything, and make a grand show of it
they mock the upper class for having so much yet being so worthless,
they turn their nose up at the middle class for having to deal with the riff raff
and they ignore the proletariat because, honestly, why encourage them?
they've been self–promoting themselves for eternity,
even going so far as inserting themselves into comic books
[which forever alienated the transitionals;
'krypton' was originally supposed to be called 'osmium' in the superman canon]
they've had a deathgrip on political power for as long as anyone can remember
helium actually inherited its position from hydrogen when hydrogen 'retired'
hydrogen's abdication to become old money has perplexed EVERYONE
[normally old money can't be bothered with things like power and ownership
they think of it as a distraction and a bore]
especially since hydrogen was, at one point, the original nouveau riche
apparently time changes all


Ununs [purple] — Inbred bastard children
this sad sack of shit is the reason you don't fuck your siblings
the one thing the old money, nouveau riche, and bourgeoisie have in common is this:
they don't want to mix common blood into their elitist cloud of ignorance
doing so severely limits the available gene pool,
and like any decent elitist snobs, they started breeding with each other
[much the way european royals did/do]
and like happens when you do that, occasionally some offspring don't turn out right
someone's missing an ear, someone's got webbed toes,
some little ununquadium's gonna look like the wolfman
and though these unfortunate specimen are usually shipped off,
ne'er to be heard from again from polite society,
occasionally some of the insolent bastards try and stick around
and no one wants to associate with some half–blind, web–toed albino inbreed
so they ended up at the bottom of the societal totem
not to be seen or heard from,
but simply to serve as a reminder that it can, in fact, get much worse
so as much as the transitionals may hate their lot in life
at least they aren't polydactyl albino hemophiliacs, like ununseptium

ψυχωτικά

i did my time, and i want out, so abusive
fate, it doesn't cut, the soul is not so vibrant
the reckoning, the sickening, back at you:
subversion, pseudo–sacred psycho virgin

go tell your classes, go dig your graves
then fil your mouth with all the money you will save
sinking in, getting smaller again
undone, it has begun, i'm not the only one

oh there are cracks in the road we lay
from when the devil fell, the secrets have gone mad
this is nothing new, but we would kill it all
fate was all we had

who needs another mess? we could start over
just look me in the eyes and say i'm wrong
now there's only emptiness, but i'm missing something
i think we're done, i'm not the only one

the limits of the dead

fake and defenseless lie [psychosocial]
i tried to tell you first [psychosocial]
your hurtful lies are giving out [psychosocial]
can't stop the killing [psychosocial]
i can't help if it's hunting season [psychosocial]
is this what you want [psychosocial]
i'm not the only one

and the rain will kill us all
if we throw ourselves against the wall
but no one else can see
the preservation of the martyr in me

psychosocial, psychosocial, psychosocial

duono

half underwater, i'm half my mother's daughter
a fraction's left up to dispute
the whole collection,
half off the price they're asking
in the halfway house of ill repute

half accidental
half pain, full instrumental
i have a lot to think about
you think they're joking?
you have to go provoke him
i guess it's high time you found out

it's half biology and half corrective surgery gone wrong
you'll notice something funny
if you hang around here for too
long ago in some black hole,
before they had these pills to take it back
i'm half jill, and half jack

two halves are equal,
a cross between two evils
it's not an enviable lot,
but if you listen
you'll learn to hear the difference
between the halves and have nots

and when i let him in i feel the stitches getting sicker
i try to wash him out,
but like they say, the blood is thicker
i see my mother in my face
but only when i travel
i run as fast as i can run
but jack comes tumbling after

and when i'm brave enough,
and find a clever way to kick him out
and i'm so high,
not even you and all your love could bring me down
on 83rd he never found the magic words to change this fact
i'm half jill, and half jack

i'm halfway home now,
half hoping for a showdown
'cuz i'm not big enough to house this crowd
it might destroy me
but i'd sacrifice my body
if it meant i'd get the jack part out

see jack run jack run jack run jack
see jack run jack run see jack run
see jack run jack, jack see run jack
run jack, run jack, run jack, run jack,
run, jack, run

không

не для меня придёт весна
не для меня дон разольётся
там сердце девичье забьётся
с восторгом чувств — не для меня

не для меня цветут сады
в долине роща расцветает
там соловей весну встречает
он будет петь — не для меня

не для меня журчат ручьи
текут алмазными струями
там дева с чёрными бровями
она растёт — не для меня

не для меня придёт пасха
за стол родня вся соберётся
вино по рюмочкам польётся
пасхальный день — не для меня

а для меня кусок свинца
он в тело белое вопьётся
и слёзы горькие прольются
такая жизнь — брат, ждёт меня

düşämbe

monday, monday, so good to me
monday mornin', it was all i hoped it would be
oh monday mornin', monday mornin' couldn't guarantee
that monday evenin' you would still be here with me

monday, monday, can't trust that day
monday, monday, sometimes it just turns out that way
oh monday mornin', you gave me no warnin' of what was to be
oh monday, monday, how could you leave and not take me

every other day, every other day,
every other day of the week is fine, yeah
but whenever monday comes, but whenever monday comes
you can find me cryin' all of the time

stfa

easily the funniest thing i've heard all day:

'Roger Sherman is the Pete Best of the Founding Fathers,
in that he "also" served on the committee that drafted the Declaration of Independence.'

if you laughed as hard as i did at that,
then you are truly a nerd
congrats

sées

i had one of my best experiences at college yesterday
no, seryusly
SERYUSLY

i got a text around noon–thirty sunday afternoon
asking if i wanted tickets to the women's basketball game
being the women's bball fan i am,
i immediately said yes and took the offer
but holy shit did i have no idea what i was in for

the reason i got them is thus:
rha does a housing bash/signup/thing every year called 'rock the block'
and they have a raffle they do every year at said bash/signup/thing
you sign up for housing, you get entered
apparently this year's prize was free tickets to the women's bball game
but, because rha took too much time telling people about it,
no one came to pick them up
one of my friends happens to be a deskie who works in abbot
and, seeing that there were multiple tickets available,
asked if they would be available if no one claimed them
they were, so she grabbed a couple and invited some people
i happened to be one of the lucky few

turns out, they weren't just game tickets
they were tickets for box seats
in one of the two boxes available at breslin
[apparently the other one is usually taken by lupe izzo]
so i got to watch the game like this [though slightly more to the left]
which was pretty fucking cool
not only did we get to sit in the luxury suite,
we were fucking CATERED. FOR. FREE
we got anything to have anything they offered
and believe you me, it was pretty damn good food

in addition to that,
it was free tshirt day for students
so i got me a shirt that says 'BEAT PURDUE' on it
and, because students like looking for free stuff,
we found basketball posters in one of the drawers of the kitchenette
so i now have a women's bball poster hanging in my room

the best part of all?
the ladies very thoroughly handled purdue, 76–57
with that, they move up #2 in the big ten
and #11 in the country
hopefully, if they keep playing like they have
[and if the men can't pull themselves together]
and make a strong run through the ncaa tourney,
these women will actually get sold–out home crowds
and the credit they deserve
cuz hot damn, they are good
maybe someday i'll get to see them play uconn
and with that fantasy, i'll stop


ADDENDUM:
i saw this on stumbleupon,
and laughed too hard not to share this:
"As a homosexual MLIAer, can I just say—
stop calling Edward Cullen gay.
We don't want him either. MLIA."

vyras

i can hear my train comin'
it's a lonesome and distant cry
i can hear my train comin'
now i'm runnin' for my life
what makes a man walk away from his mind?
i think i know
i think i might know

i can feel the wind blowin'
it's sending shivers down my spine
i can feel the wind blowin'
it shakes the trees and the power lines
what makes a man spend his whole life in disguise?
i think i know
i think i might know

i can see the sun settin'
it's casting shadows on the sea
i can see the sun, it's settin'
it's getting colder and starting to freeze
what makes a man what to break a heart with ease?
i think i know
i think i might know

well i can hear my train comin'
looks like time is not on my side
well i can hear my train comin'
i'm still runnin' for my life
what makes a man pray when he's about to die?
i think i know
i think i might know

över

you better crawl on your knees
and the next time you say that you love me,
fall on your knees
cuz this time i won't be so kind
can't you see that this is life, and life
is killing me?
is it yours? is it mine?
our sky fell down tonight,
to wash away our pain

you better see how evil you can be
when you see my evil smile
it's the one that you'll remember
when i am not so kind
can't you see that this is death, and death
is saving me
i say burn all of your bridges
while you still have control of the flame
i know it's hard, but you

tell me, over and over and over and over and over again
it never was the time for us,
it never was the time to let me in
show me, over and over and over and over and over again
the time for us,
it never was the time to let me in

you're hard and to the point,
so hard and to the point

maimonides

i did my civic duty today
yup. i voted.
this was the second time i've done it by absentee ballot
[i did in 2008 too]
it seems to be developing into a trend
in my three years as a registered voter,
i've yet to step foot in an actual voting booth
granted, there were a couple local elections i missed
mostly cuz i never know when the fuck they are, but still
maybe someday i'll actually vote where i live

also speaking of absentee ballots
i have a bone to pick with the gub'ment about them:
it gets sent to us very quickly, quicker than normal mail]
you provide three envelopes with it
[the one it comes it, the return envelope, and the privacy sleeve]
you have the actual printed paper ballot,
which, by the way, is pretty long and always double sided
you give us all these instructions to fill them out and send them back
and yet, when i go to mail it back in the envelopes provided,
why in the hell do i have to pay the postage?
seriously, you go through all the trouble of mailing this shit to me
and you pay for it to get mailed to me, but not back?
the hell is that?
is it really that hard to pay the 61¢ postage?
our tax dollars at work, apparently

also, since we're on the subject of politics,
words can't describe how out of place i feel here
everyone goes on and on about the city and state officials
bloomberg this, albany that, holy christ it's paladino,
d'you hear what cuomo said yesterday,
and hot damn about that there working families party
they could be talking about scandinavian bear wrestling for all i know
i like to think i'm moderately informed about politics,
but i have enough problems keeping up with michigan politics
[which, by the way, nearly gives me a stroke to think about]
and trying to keep up with what connecticut does these days?
it's a wonder i even know who's running
but damn, even trying to understand new york politics gives me a headache
bullshit nonsense is what it is

fire–flaucht

this lonely existence paves the way
for the hard of hearts must beat, be brave
while this quiet lightning storm
wrecks the harvest gold we try to sow

so it begins, the way the blood still dances beneath the skin
as the messenger from hell says, we're bound to win
as the days they come, but the years they go
so take care of your freedom, they'll never know

i sit on the wing for a blackbird's song
to tell me where and when this all went wrong
there's no resolution without remorse
ignorance is bliss, defend, let's stay the course

puncture the skin, and see it's blood run cold on desert sand
come hear the men from mothers with childless hands
as the days they come, but the years they go
so take care of your freedom, they'll never know
take good care of your freedom, they'll never know

take what you give until there's nothing left but forever lived
and night descends on shadows without their kill

as the days they come, but the years they go

so take care of your freedom, they'll never know

yeah, take good care of your freedom, they'll never know

as the days they come, but the years they go

so take care of your freedom, they'll never know