Showing posts with label friday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friday. Show all posts

11/16/12

跑步者

dear friend, they'll destroy you
but it ain't nothing, it ain't nothing to me
[disappeared in isolation, irretrievable salvation,
the only thing, the only thing you need]

veil of the departed is alive, is alive

honesty, on a string

disappeared in isolation, irretrievable salvation,
the only thing, the only thing you need
[different, they'll destroy you
but it ain't nothing, it ain't nothing to me]

3/30/12

sovetsk

today, blogasaurs, i finally completed my goal
THE MUSIC CULL HAS BEEN SUCCESSFUL
it means so much to me, it's in all caps
[it is a meaningless accomplishment]

so, for those of us keeping score [read: no one], here's the tally:
i started with 90.72 gigs, 15102 songs, >1038 hours worth of music,
i have now 70.22 gigs, 11618 songs, and ~787 hours
which, if you're counting, is a 22.6% decrease
so yeah, a fifth of my music is gone now
AND my entire library will fit on my ipod again

so yeah, that's what i've done for the past month,
what about you?


ADDENDUM:
the new blogger interface is TERRIBLE
they were going for minimalist, they achieved confusing
way to go fixing something that wasn't broke, blogger

3/9/12

ch'uju

hello, darkness, my old friend, i've come to talk with you again,
because a vision softly creeping left its seeds while i was sleeping
and the vision that was planted in my brain still remains,
within the sound of silence

in restless dreams i walked alone, narrow streets of cobblestone,
'neath the halo of a street lamp, i turned my collar to the cold and damp
when my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light that split the night
and touched the sound of silence

and in the naked light, i saw ten thousand people, maybe more
people talking without speaking, people hearing without listening
people writing songs that voices never shared,
and no one dared disturb the sound of silence

'fools', i said, 'you do not know, silence like a cancer grows
hear my words that i might teach you, take my arms that i might reach you'
but my words, like silent raindrops, fell and echoed
in the wells of silence

and the people bowed and prayed to the neon god they made,
and the sign flashed its warning in the words that it was forming
and the sign said:
'the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls and tenement halls'
and whispered in the sounds of silence

3/2/12

ĝemo

serve god, love me, and mend
this is not the end
live unbruised, we are friends
and i'm sorry, i'm sorry

sigh no more, no more
one foot in sea and one on shore
my heart was never pure,
and you know me, you know me

but man is a giddy thing

love, it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you,
it will set you free
be more like the man you were made to be
there is a design, an alignment, a cry of my heart to see
the beauty of love is it was made to be

1/20/12

dominium eminens

today, at long last, is the day i talk about my thesis.
just under a year after i decided to undertake my final project,
it's completed, graded, and i've graduated.
and i've decided to give you lot the chance to hear about it one last time.

let me say this at the outset:
i'm putting my thesis on this blog post by including it as a downloadable link.
there would be no point in talking about it if i didn't let you read it for yourself.
even though i've included a copyright on every page to avoid it being stolen/plagiarized,
i'm placing no restrictions on who can link to it, distribute it, or post it elsewhere,
so long as i am properly credited, and this post is directly linked to [if applicable].
i do this not to be egotistical and demand credit at every turn,
but so comments, criticism, feedback, &c can go directly to me,
as well as providing proof that i gave permission to freely distribute it.
i have no problem with my thesis finding its way through the vast and magical interwubs,
i just want to make sure everyone knows who and where it came from.
as such,
i hereby grant written permission for my thesis,
"chicken littleisms: kelo v. city new london and the meaning of 'public use',
to be freely distributed on the internet, provided proper credit and links are given.


with that out of the way, let's get to it.
buckle up, it's gonna be a long post.


i suppose i owe you more than a few words on my thesis,
but, in the interest of both space and getting you to read it,
i'll give you the basic rundown of it.

in 1997, new london, ct, which had been suffering an economic downturn,
was informed of pfizer pharmaceutical's interest in building a new research hq.
they lobbied hard and got pfizer to announce plans to build it in fort trumbull,
one of new london's small waterfront neighborhoods.
trouble was, the area around the pfizer site was rather destitute.
in addition to pfizer remediating the site they'd ultimately use,
they asked the city to rejuvenate some of the surrounding land.
since said land contained rundown buildings, business, and a residential neighborhood,
the city needed a plan for how it would go about fixing up the neighborhood,
and it turned to its newly–restarted development corporation to create one.
the nldc drafted a thorough plan to rejuvenate the neighborhood
[the municipal development plan, or mdp],
and it was approved by the city council in february 2000.
the plan revolved around the use of eminent domain:
by using eminent domain to acquire all the land in the fort trumbull neighborhood,
they could then demolish all the businesses and residences.
this would allow them to build businesses and accommodations near the fort instead,
complementing pfizer and creating a smaller business district south of downtown.

the way new london was able to use eminent domain came down to interpretation.
eminent domain's power comes from the 5th amendment's takings clause
['...nor shall private propery be taken for public use, without just compensation],
and in connecticut, 'public use' has been consistently been interpreted broadly,
incorporating many different definitions of 'use' by the public.
thus, in ct, it is legal to use eminent domain for economic redevelopment,
since the economic benefits of doing so have been deemed of public use.
so, new london used eminent domain in that way to reinvigorate its economy,
and provide public use by way of jobs, increased tax revenue, and strengthened economy.
understandably, that mindset didn't sit well with the fort trumbull residents,
and they began protesting the mdp and the nldc's use of eminent domain.
their protests grew in scope and publicity,
and they eventually partnered with the institute for justice,
a washington d.c. law firm specializing in libertarian issues.
the fight revolved around whether nldc's use of eminent domain was valid,
and ij ultimately filed suit against the city on behalf of eleven residents.

the case [kelo v. city of new london] started in the ct superior court,
where the judge decided that eminent domain for economic redevelopment was valid,
but only in some parts of nldc's plan, and not others.
both sides appealed to the ct supreme court,
which ruled that the city's use of eminent domain was valid across the board.
ij again appealed the csc ruling to the us supreme court,
where the csc ruling was upheld, to much publicity and press coverage.
that ruling sparked a spree of litigation across the country to address eminent domain,
which has continued to this day.

what i argue is that much of the reaction to kelo is misguided and misinformed.
while i respect and acknowledge various interpretations of the takings clause,
many who protest kelo do not.
critics, pundits, and lawyers have skewed and misrepresented kelo consistently
and have allowed it to become a big–government bogeyman,
convincing people that the government can wantonly take your home for any reason,
or, scarier yet, for no reason at all.
i believe that there are far too many uninformed voices screeching about kelo,
and i wanted to provide a thoughtful, measured, factual account of the case and its origin.
the only way to understand the case is by understanding the city and the people,
the circumstances surrounding the mdp, the lawsuit,
and most importantly, the 5th amendment and the meaning of 'public use'.
not only did i want people to know how kelo came about and why,
i also wanted them to know what the kelo ruling does and doesn't mean.

hyperbole and parroted information can only get us so far.
at some point someone has to tell the truth in an honest and concise way,
and that's what i set out to do.
i know this case seems like an obscure topic to write about,
but it's come to mean a lot to me,
and hopefully will mean something to you to once you've finished reading it.
i'm sure there are at least some who are wondering how i chose this in the first place,
so, as follow up, the story of how i came to write this.


a little over a year ago,
the time had arrived for me to pick a topic for my senior honors thesis.
my thesis would be required to graduate from the honors college,
and i needed to pick a topic i could write at least 50 pages on.
considering that my longest paper to that point had been only 20 pages
[my interesting–yet–maddening paper on norway and denmark during wwII],
i needed something i knew i would like, be passionate about, and stick with.
i'd had a number of ideas float through my head,
from something russian history related, to something about the progressive era,
to something regarding the state of the labor movement
[i was fresh off my labor studies internship in new york at the time].
after meeting with my honors advisor and talking to her about it,
she recommended i meet with dr fine, a professor i'd never met.
dr fine was an american/labor/women's history prof,
and we briefly fleshed out possible topics i could write about.
i kept having nagging doubts about the themes we were hitting on,
and knew that if i wasn't vested in what i was writing about,
it would be half–assed and boring.
after a few meeting with her and dr moch,
a recurring topic kept popping into my head: my hometown.
i could write something about the history of where i'm from,
and it was then that i realized:
i should write about kelo.

kelo was something i'd known about all my life, but knew little about.
i knew my mom had worked at nldc, the corporation at the heart of the case,
and that my dad had worked, for a time, at the pfizer complex near fort trumbull.
i also knew that the case was near–infamous and usually misconstrued.
i did a little light research into the case,
and the only articles i could find on it were from legal journals and publications,
the same went for books: almost solely published by legal groups and law scholars
[with the exception of one or two questionable non–fiction books].
i knew that primary research was the focal point of the thesis requirement,
since their goal is to make academics out of us,
and decided that there was no better topic to write about:
there was no historical literature on kelo, very few popular writings,
and none of them seemed to put all the pieces of the case together.
i'd found the perfect topic.

once i'd decided on kelo and figured out what i was gonna write about,
i was faced with an unfortunate realization:
i knew jack shit about eminent domain.
before i could even conceive of writing anything about kelo,
i first had to figure out what in the hell the basics of eminent domain were.
so, for a full three weeks over the summer,
i spent my time in the law library with a 2 foot high stack of legal texts.
much to my surprise, i found the topic both interesting and easy to pick up on,
which made my transition from federal to connecticut law that much easier.
of all the things i'm grateful for concerning this thesis,
i'm most grateful that i was genuinely interested in the legal aspect of it.
if i'd found eminent domain law boring and dry and imcomprehensible,
there's a decent chance i would've changed topics about six months ago.

after i'd slogged through about 5000 pages worth of legal text
[i promise you that is not an overstatement
i read 3 books that were 1000+ pages, and four that were between 400–700 pages],
and as i started reading primary and secondary sources about kelo,
i was again faced with a rather stark reality:
virtually all of my sources were one–sided.
they almost all took up arms against the city and against the kelo ruling.
there was very little diversity in their opinions,
and there was a metric shit–tonne of rhetoric and biased sprinkled into their writings.
the books and articles all became one angry haze after another,
and took none of the context or circumstances of the case into consideration.
i was basically reading publication after publication lambast my hometown,
and i was staggered by it.
i had never known new london to be as egregious and uncaring as it was portrayed,
and i refused to believe that the city was flagrantly abusive and willfully acting illegally,
at least not without concrete and indisputable proof.
and so it was that i changed my focus and goal:
i wasn't simply going to explain the case as a legal decision,
i was going to tell the story of new london, fort trumbull,
and explain what happened leading up to the decision to use eminent domain.
it wasn't enough to explain what eminent domain was and how it was legal:
i had to show what new london was like, what it had gone through,
what the people of fort trumbull were like, what they had gone through,
and how the city planned to change its waterfront.
so much for struggling to figure out how to write 50 pages.

writing my thesis was by far one of the biggest challenges i've ever faced.
first off, how do you even tackle something that massive?
i knew it would take lots of organization and planning,
but that means nothing when you're staring at a blank word document,
completely at a loss on how to begin.
i had no idea how to do justice to everything that was involved with this project,
and constantly struggled with how to be fair to everyone involved.
i couldn't victimize or demonize the residents of fort trumbull,
any more than i could  demonize or apologize for the city.
objectivity is a tricky thing to utilize.
you have have to be detached, appraising, and not take anything for granted,
but you can't let yourself dehumanize people or circumstances.
you have to give all the facts, but not skew them for others,
and you have to present both sides of the argument, while taking only one side.
no matter what anyone else says,
that is the single most difficult thing to achieve in writing.
i won't lie to you and say i achieved optimal objectivity when writing this,
because, after all, i'm human like the rest of you,
but i strove for it nonetheless.
i know i haven't managed to eliminate bias from it
[and, truthfully, you could argue that i wouldn't be able to,
considering where my parents worked],
but i did my damnedest to be factual and honest about kelo.
i did my diligence in researching the hell out of my topic,
and did as much as i could for a student with limited resources.


for a while now i've been unsure what to do with my thesis.
should i try publishing it? should i try to make it into a book?
i didn't want the last eight months to ultimately result in nothing
[and by nothing i mean sitting in a library surrounded by other theses not being read],
so i decided that the best thing to do would be to publish it myself [so to speak].
it's a good paper that tells an important story and provides important information,
and it would be selfish and stupid to keep it to myself.
i hope that at least some of find this thesis informative and interesting,
and that it helps change at least a few preconceived notions.
or, at the very least, makes you think.


okay, rambling over. please read my thesis and pass it along. kthnxbai.

1/13/12

colloquy

i was looking for something to read the other day,
mostly because i miss reading for my own enjoyment,
and i came across a book of short stories by shirley jackson
many of you may know her for the story 'the lottery',
which is a wonderful and intriguing story in its own right,
but i love her for a different reason:
she is the author of hands–down my favorite short story ever
and because i am in a generous mood, i'm sharing it with you
"Colloquy", Shirley Jackson, ©1944, The New Yorker




The doctor was competent-looking and respectable. Mrs Arnold felt vaguely comforted by his appearance, and her agitation lessened a little. She knew that he noticed her hand shaking when she leaned forward for him to light her cigarette, and she smiled apologetically, but he looked back at her seriously.

“You seem to be upset,” he said gravely.

“I’m very upset,” Mrs Arnold said. She tried to talk slowly and intelligently. “That’s one reason I came to you instead of going to Doctor Murphy—our regular doctor, that is.”

The doctor frowned slightly. “My husband,” Mrs Arnold went on. “I don’t want him to know that I’m worried, and Doctor Murphy would probably feel it was necessary to tell him.” The doctor nodded, not committing himself, Mrs Arnold noted.

“What seems to be the trouble?”

Mrs Arnold took a deep breath. “Doctor,” she said, “how do people tell if they’re going crazy?”

The doctor looked up.

“Isn’t that silly,” Mrs Arnold said, “I hadn’t meant to say it like that. It’s hard enough to explain anyway, without making it so dramatic.”

“Insanity is more complicated than you think,” the doctor said.

“I know it’s complicated,” Mrs Arnold said. “That’s the only think I’m really sure of. Insanity is one of those things I mean.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“That’s my trouble, Doctor.” Mrs Arnold sat back and took her gloves out from under her pocketbook and put them carefully on top. Then she took them and put them underneath the pocketbook again.

“Suppose you just tell me all about it,” the doctor said.

Mrs Arnold sighed. “Everyone else seems to understand,” she said, “and I don’t. Look.” She leaned forward and gestured with one hand while she spoke. “I don’t understand the way people live. It all used to be so simple. When I was a little girl I used to live in a world where a lot of other people lived too and they all lived together and things went along like that with no fuss.” She looked at the doctor. He was frowning again, and Mrs Arnold went on, her voice rising slightly. “Look. Yesterday morning my husband stopped on his way to his office to buy a paper. He always buys the Times and he always buys it from the same dealer, and yesterday the dealer didn’t have a Times for my husband and last night when he came home for dinner he said the fish was burned and the dessert was too sweet and he sat around all evening talking to himself.”

“He could have tried to get it at another dealer,” the doctor said. “Very often dealers downtown have papers later than local dealers.”

“No,” Mrs Arnold said, slowly and distinctly, “I guess I’d better start over. When I was a little girl—” she said. Then she stopped. “Look,” she said, “did there use to be words like psychosomatic medicine? Or international cartels? Or bureaucratic centralization?”

“Well,” the doctor began.

“What do they mean?” Mrs Arnold insisted.

“In a period of international crisis,” the doctor said gently, “when you find, for instance, cultural patterns rapidly disintegrating…”

“International crisis,” Mrs Arnold said. “Patterns.” She began to cry quietly. “He said the man had no right not to save him a Times,” she said hysterically, fumbling in her pocket for a handkerchief, “and he started talking about social planning on the local level and surtax net income and geopolitical concepts and deflationary inflation.” Mrs Arnold’s voice rose to a wail. “He really said deflationary inflation.”

“Mrs Arnold,” the doctor said, coming around the desk, “we’re not going to help things any this way.”

“What is going to help?” Mrs Arnold said. “Is everyone really crazy but me?”

“Mrs Arnold,” the doctor said severely, “I want you to get a hold of yourself. In a disoriented world like ours today, alienation from reality frequently—”

“Disoriented,” Mrs Arnold said. She stood up. “Alienation,” she said. “Reality.” Before the doctor could stop her she walked to the door and opened it. “Reality,” she said, and went out.

9/23/11

deurywioldeb

apparently today is celebrate bisexuality day
why today, though, i couldn't tell you
it's not as though september 23 has any special significance
[although it is the anniversary of mozilla's first public web browser, phoenix
perhaps a subtle outing of firefox as a multi–gender philanderer of a  web browser?]

i'm not sure about the rest of you bi guys and gals out there,
but i'm sure as shit not celebrating
it's not really something deserving of a celebration, is it?
maybe if it was the cause of some fantastic achievement,
["bisexuality shown to provide perfect antidote to lupus"
or was the heretofore–unknown key to some human advancement
["invention of gunpowder linked to bisexuality, chinese researchers find"]
or maybe even provided some sort of tactical advantage
["bisexuals 78% more likely to become ornithologists, u.n. peacekeepers"]
if any of those were the case, i'd be more than willing to
but alas, it is not

so, instead of spending the day celebrating something i just am
[i also happen to be male, scottish, brunette, a yankee, hairy, snarky, and tall]
i'll be doing things that actually matter to me,
like homework and thesis research

...and toasting firefox's ninth birthday
naturally

7/15/11

светло

i'm comin' outta my cage, and i've been doin' just fine
gotta gotta be down becuase i want it all
it started out with a kiss, how did it end up like this?
it was only a kiss, it was only a kiss

now i'm falling asleep, and she's calling a cab
while he's havin' a smoke and she's takin' a drag
now they're goin' to bed, and my stomach is sick
and it's all in my head

but she's touching his chest, now
he takes off her dress, now
let me go
and i just can't look,
it's killing me and taking control

jealousy, turning saints into the sea
swimming through sick lullabies
choking on your alibis
but it's just the price i pay
destiny is calling me
open up my eager eyes
cuz i'm mr brightside

i never...

7/8/11

tinguereguif

in which i compare comments of two professors:
one, who actually had pith, wit, and constructive comments,
and the other, who constantly filled me with rage and confusion

rage and confusion prof:
all i got from this prof was snarky comments,
attacking my ability to write and my choice of words
the kind of prof who is impossible to please,
because of a deep–seated belief that most people are inherently unable to write
but, for someone unknown reason,
grades as though you did nothing wrong
here is but a sample of some of the comments i got on response papers:
  • [in response to the description 'pagan areas of africa'] there were also Less Pagan areas?
  • [in response to a typo] ??? What does this mean?
  • [in response to a typo in a quote] Aha! Cadamosto was 1. not Portuguese, but Venetian and 2. in full command of grammar.
  • [in response to the use of the historical term 'Muhammadan'] What does this mean? We call it “Muslim” nowadays, right?
  • [in response to native Africans being 'intrigued' with new technology] I’m glad that Cadamosto brought his intrigu-o-meter.
  • [in response to my using the word 'intrigued'] Also, don’t use the word intrigued, it means absolutely nothing.
  • [in response to a concluding sentence] this sentence adds precisely nothing, it merely wastes space.
  • [a general critique of on paper] Your paper is generally good, although you have a number of warped phrases in a kind of falsely erudite english—actually the language, widely spoken among undergraduates, called gibberish. Try to say what you mean and mean what you say. Use precise terms and don't argue by suggestion.
  • [in response to my concluding paragraph] This last paragraph isn’t really that interesting. It doesn’t add much to your discussion, does it. Perhaps you could have gone deeper here to make these last sentences worthwhile.
  • [in response to my using the word 'extremely'] avoid adjectives in academic prose, and also adverbs—unless absolutely necessary.
  • [in response to using the word 'redeeming'] This is a loaded word, right?
  • [in response to using the word 'neutral'] It’s a bit too safe of a position, though. Surely the dead Indians did not find the Europeans “neutral”.
  • [in response to the term 'comparably little resistance' to Christian missions] also, comparatively few converts—like none.
final grade for this course: 4.0
given the level of semantic bitching this prof did,
you'd think i warranted a 2.0
what a cocksucker


pith and wit prof:
this prof was actually enjoyable to be in class with
i always got interesting and engaging discussions
along with amusing sentiments and downright oddities
this prof also had a very present sense of humor
which you could catch in virtually any context
here is but one of the emails i got over the course of the semester:

Title: Alien Mind Control
Dear all: Some of you have asked me in a panic when your final drafts are due. Clearly, you silly earthlings, you have not read my mind. I can accept them up until the morning of the 4th, the day when many of you Terrans go shoot off things that make loud noises and scare dogs. That is a Monday by your reckoning. I will see you all on what you call Thursday. I will be the one with the spaceship that has cool landing gear.


which would you rather have?
...that's what i thought

4/29/11

lingg

i was planning to write a long entry in here
one where i blow off steam and explain my anger
and i got most of the way through it,
when i decided a summation was more in order

i am a loyal person, extremely loyal in most cases
i take my involvement in groups/organizations/ideologies seriously
when you imply that i don't, and that i'll betray when it's convenient for me,
it really fucking bothers me
especially when i've done nothing but committed myself to it,
and taken great pains to become involved and leave my mark
it's about as close to being offended as i can get
so don't. EVER. fucking do it

i can take a joke, and i can grasp sarcasm,
but there is a major difference between those and passive seriousness
and believe me, i can tell which is which
especially when it's been bandied around for a while
so if you're going to make implications about me on the sly,
just know that i take it very seriously,
and it is not something i forgive easily


not exactly a summation,
but it's a hell of a lot shorter than what i had before

3/11/11

di-haoine

i want to believe in myself once again
so i dream of a man whose hopes never end
to kiss with a girl who's as lovely as you
i'd give you my heart if you gave me the truth

and for every tear that is lost from an eye,
i'd dig me a well where no man could destroy
i want to believe in a freedom that's bold
but all i remember is the freedom of old

well i lost me a wife, so i found me a plane
flew all the way to california
this mess in my head is a mess getting out
you drink too much coffee, i drink too much stout

but after a while, when my mouth ain't so dry
i'll dance up a storm, sure life's looking fine
but as darkness falls i return to my bed
don't ask me more questions, don't fuck with my head

the buildings they shake, but my heart it beats still
oh mother of jesus, i feel pretty ill
i want to go home where my feet both feel safe
but there ain't no jobs in the old free state

so i must remain in my new adopted land
i'm doing the best, hell i'm doin' all i can
so the next time you see me, don't ask for my name
for i am the kind and sure long may i reign

i've been down in this world, down and almost broken
like thousands of people, left standing in their shoe
i've been down in this world, down and almost broken
as thousands they grieve as the black friday rule

1/28/11

marija

what's the matter, mary jane, had a hard day?
so place the 'don't disturb' sign on the door
you lost your place in line again, what a pity,
you never seem to want to dance anymore

it's a long way down on this roller coaster
the last–chance streetcar went off the track
and you're on it

i hear you're counting sheep again, mary jane
what's the point of trying to dream anymore?
i hear you're losing weight again, mary jane
do you ever wonder who you're losing it for?

well, it's full speed, baby, in the wrong direction
there's a few more bruises if that's the way
you insist on heading

please be honest, mary jane, are you happy?
please don't censor your tears

you're the sweet crusader, and you're on your way
you're the last great innocent
and that's why i love you

so take this moment, mary jane, and be selfish
worry not about the cars that go by
'cuz all that matters, mary jane, is your freedom
so keep warm, my dear, keep dry

tell me, what's the matter, mary jane?

12/31/10

repost

i posted this on my other blog
but i figured i'd throw the link up here, too
cuz i dunno how many of you schmucks read the other one

at any rate,
after putting it off for the better part of 18 months,
i finally went through my hard drive
and put my photos from russia online
i had no real reason for doing it now,
other than i was INSANELY bored on the train ride back
and i needed something to do,
so i went through and edited all the photos on my computer
[and i do mean all of them]

so, here for your viewing pleasure
[along with my photos from new york/chicago/dc]
are my photos from russia
enjoy

picasaweb.google.com/nuyorussia
[in case it isn't clear,
'vg' stands for volgograd
'sp' is saint petersburg
'msc' is moscow]

9/17/10

elinikäinen

you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
you may find yourself in another part of the world
you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
you may find yourself in a beautiful house with a beautiful wife
you may ask yourself, 'well, how did i get here?'

you may ask yourself, 'how do i work this?'
you may ask yourself, 'where is that large automobile?
you may tell yourself, 'this is not my beautiful house'
you may tell yourself, 'this is not my beautiful wife'

water dissolving and water removing
there is water at the bottom of the ocean
remove the water, carry the water
remove the water from the bottom of the ocean

you may ask yourself, 'what is that beautiful house?'
you may ask yourself, 'where does that highway lead to?'
you may ask yourself, 'where does that highway lead to?
you may ask yourself, 'my god, what have i done?'

letting the days go by, let the water hold me down
letting the days go by, water flowing underground
into the blue again, after the money's gone
once in a lifetime, water flowing underground
into the blue again, into silent water
under the rocks and stones, there is water underground
letting the days go by, into silent water
once in a lifetime, water flowing underground
same as it ever was

time isn't holding us, time isn't after us
time isn't holding us, time doesn't hold you back
time isn't holding us, time isn't after us
time isn't holding us...
letting the days go by

8/13/10

divendres

it's friday afternoon
and i'm on the train again
blinded by orange
the conductor's yelling something
but the kids are yelling
'we're bein' held up again!'

and it's so cold out
and i'm not getting warmer
by walking faster
and i must look really silly
like a hermit crab in rush hour
to see you

and you're sleeping peacefully
and i'm walking frantically
and i wouldn't have it any other way
without you, babe

7/30/10

lascelles

i love my cat
she gives the best looks
[which is no surprise, considering i'm infamous for mine]
also, she's cuddly and all black
and i love her good
that is all

i seem to be at odds with lots of people i know
most seem to be clamoring for school to start up again
[which is still a month off]
while i'm enjoying my summer and not really ready for it to end
talk about a fucking role reversal
usually i can't wait for summer to be done
so it goes

also,
i can't really peg down a reason for this,
but despite the fact that i've spent a lot of time down in e/l this summer
[which is an inexact qualifier,
since any time is a lot compared to the none of summers past]
i've felt more isolated from my friends than i thought i would
not really sure why,
but i feel this weird disconnect from everyone i've talked to/seen
maybe i'm regressing into my old friendship fears/insecurities
that or i'm so blinded by stupidity i'm imagining all of it
who the fuck knows

ALSO,
i would like it known that i typed 'friendhip' originally in the above,
and it cracked my shit up
i imagined a weird adam's rib–type situation,
where you break off pieces of your hip bone[s]
and create friends by growing them in a host body
i'm gonna chalk that up to fatigue and dementia

7/16/10

사기

my pain is self chosen
at least, so the prophet says
i could either burn,
or cut off my pride and buy some time

a head full of lies is the weight,
tied to my waist

my pain is self chosen
at least, i believe it to be
i could either drown,
or pull off my skin and swim to shore
now i can grow a beautiful shell
for all to see

the river of deceit pulls down, yeah,
the only direction we flow is down
down, oh down

the pain is self chosen, yeah,
our pain is self chosen

5/14/10

ogooué

i got to cook today
and i was fucking ecstatic about it
i very rarely enjoy making myself food
[even though i love eating good stuff]
but today, goddamn it, i was gonna
so i did
and the resulting feast was glorious
i made a russian meal of epic proportions
schi, two types of salat, chicken kiev,
along with some nice dark rye and tvorog
finished off with some black tea
made me feel like i was back in volgograd
[also, i'm getting closer to perfecting the schi
i'm trying to replicate lyuda's,
but i'm still not there yet]
at any rate, i'm debating what i should make next
i'm sure i'll think of something

also, since i've been asked about it by a number of people,
the play was incredible
we had a disappointing turnout,
[probly due to cancelling one of the performances]
but man did they appreciate it
and the show really pulled itself together tech week
first day down in the theater put everything in motion
[unlike some other recent roial shows,
brick and oppenheimer, to name a few]
and we had three fucking amazing shows that weekend
i'm kinda sorry to see that show end
i don't pine after it like lots of actors do,
but i'd still love to do another performance
it's nice to end the year on a high note like that
pity i couldn't have last year, too

i'm sure none of you give a rat's ass about this,
but my job search is ever ongoing
hopefully i'll find something halfway decent
that or something that pays well
god knows i'll need as much money as i can get my hands on
housing in nyc ain't gonna be cheap

also, as a complete sidenote:
they updated the wikipedia homepage
and refurbed some details of it
most notably: the links aren't as blue as they used to be
they're more blue/gray now
why do i always notice shit like this?

5/7/10

live at gotham

hey blogosphere, guess what?
i actually have something to say today
nice a change of pace, isn't it?
i would've shared a few days ago,
but i figured i'd let finals finish before i did



i got good news about three days ago
first good news i'd gotten in a while, actually
turns out, i got accepted for the internship i applied for
but, that in and of itself isn't a huge deal
the big deal is that it's a semester long
and it's not at msu
this fall, i'm gonna be studying at cuny on scholarship,
[city university of new york]
taking classes in labor history
and interning with a union organization
[plus, i get a weekly stipend]
i'm pretty fuckin stoked about it

i figured i should probly make this public knowledge
especially since i'll have to cancel on some commitments,
but it's still kinda cool, yeah?
i've been lookin to take a break from school for a while
msu's great, don't get me wrong,
but the novelty starts to wear off after a while
and, nothing like new york for a change of pace,
hopefully my dislike for it will wear off quickly

also, since i'm sure some of you would jump at the opportunity,
consider this an open invitation to come visit
i'm sure i could use the company

4/16/10

nscl

holy shit, son
do i have news for you people

this year, in us news & world report's yearly ranking of grad schools/programs,
itchose five msu grad programs as #1 in the country for their respective fields
guess what they are?
–elementary education
–secondary education
–rehabilitation counseling
–industrial and organizational psychology
NUCLEAR FUCKING PHYSICS

that's right, i'm not lying
msu beat out the massachusetts institute of technology and cal tech in nuclear physics
this is fucking incredible
the fact that we have five number one programs is awesome
[and our college of ed has been number one for sixteen years]
but the fact that we edged out such a science powerhouse is amazing
and now we have the frib at our cyclotron
we're just rockin' the sciencey shit here now

as a side note,
i think msu should get a new slogan for their commercials
enough of this 'advancing knowledge, transforming lives' bullshit
i propose something new:
'Michigan State University: We'll Science the Shit Out of You'


references n shit:
msu article
freep article
state news article