wolff's law

with this semester coming to a close,
i can finally say that i can empathize with people who hate history
i've had the two types of profs that most stereotype our discipline:
the boring, rambling, all-over-the-place, grades-hard-as-balls prof [last fall]
and the condescending, meddling, i'm-better-than-you'll-ever-be prof [this fall]
i swear to god, they've both made me crazy as shit
they even make me wonder whether i even want to go into history
cuz god knows i'll never get away from people like them
i won't be able to get away from the one i have this fall even if i try
he's fucking married to my advisor, and they both know my majors
which means they're probly gonna try to stick me with him next year
and i'll be damned if i'm gonna write a 50-75 page paper for this man
20 pages is giving me enough trouble

it's also never been clearer to me that i don't want to go into russian history
i'm perfectly content just being fluent in another language
russia doesn't need to have a stranglehold on my entire academic life
i don't wanna be another siegelbaum

this semester's contained a first for me
i honestly don't give a shit how well i do in my history class
my motivation for that class just evaporated,
and i couldn't say when or why
normally something happens that makes me not care anymore
like, 'hey, this prof obviously doesn't care how good this work is,
he's gonna be a dick when he grades regardless'
or, 'this class has absolutely no effect on my major at all
it's boring and i just don't give a damn anymore'
but not this time
if i can just throw together a paper and hand it in i'll be perfectly content
and i know fucking up in this class is gonna screw me over later on
but i'll cross that bridge when i get to it

if i can survive another week, i'll be home free
very literally, too
i get to leave on monday of finals week cuz i don't have any finals
thank god for projects, even though they're kicking my ass
especially that poli/sci honors project i forgot about till last thursday
that's due this coming thursday
thank god i already have all the info for that
my photojournalism project, thankfully, came together perfectly
that one was a bitch to pull together, but that'll be done by tomorrow
i'm gonna survive this with my sanity intact, goddamn it

as a complete side-note
i have to make a website over break
anybody want to help/give me pointers/do it for me?