9/11/07

nada

so, no fire alarms since friday
apparently, the jackass decided to stop

i haven't been this exhausted in...
christ, not since my period of enlightened euphoria
which wouldve been early to mid '06
closing brimstone sucks
closing brimstone BY YOURSELF sucks worse
closing brimstone by yourself TWICE IN ONE WEEKEND?
fuckin priceless
my hands havent ever been that/this cut up
fucking steel wool i had to scrape the grates with

also
i dunno what's been up with sleeping in this room
last night i went to bed at 10`45
i figured i'd get about 10-12 hours of sleep
since i didnt have to get up till 10`30
did i? of course not
kept waking up all night sweating my ass off
dunno how, since it was 50º outside, and the window was open
i, apparently, am in need of a nap
and i don't think i'm going to work today
i doubt i'll last half an hour in that dishroom

i miss reading
actual reading, the kind you do because you want to
the kind where you sit/lay down and just read for about 5 hours
devouring a really good novel like a roast chicken
as opposed to reading a bunch of b/s about child labor
some righteousness, reforming, progressive bitch
complaining about the state of children in the 1900s and 1910s
i could do without that
never, in the history of my life
have i ever not looked forward to a history class
and yet now, i do
damn

today
i remember going into mr cusson's class
and preparing myself for a long, arduous period
and hearing eli levine talk about how the twin towers were gone
and we had a...'philosophical' discussion about it
and how, when i got home
all i did was watch tv for the three hours before my dad got home
but most of all
how, when i crossed the goldstar bridge
i could see that cloud above the horizon
it makes such a difference having lived out there
people in michigan
or anywhere not near the northeast
just don't quite grasp its enormity
because they simply weren't there

i have to go down and tell my boss i'm not coming in
i don't have the energy to work 4 hours in the dishroom
i don't have the energy for class, either
but my prof will get pissed if i don't go
so i don't really have a choice

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