футбольский университет

glad to see i got to this in a timely fashion
it's only been about six 'tomorrow's' since last time
at least i got to it
god knows i need to be doing physics homework
BUT i'm not gonna, not yet [bad move on my part]
i'd rather do this

also, i've seen two ambulances on campus this week
which is more than i've seen in the past year here
people need to stop dying/getting injured


like i said last time, i'm gonna bitch about coaching changes
mostly because the way they're handled pisses me off
under NO circumstances can i see why you'd fire a coach after one year
hell, even bill peterson got more than that
and he ended up going 1–18 with the oilers back in the 70s
most coaches sign three year contracts at the beginning
and usually they're given that time to do what they do
even if they end up doing poorly,
they're at least given a shot to prove what they're worth
but there's really no reason to fire a coach in under three years
unless there are serious mitigating circumstances
that's just ridiculous

this year, jim mora got fired from the seahawks
after only a single year
what the fuck, seattle?
were you seriously expecting another holmgren after one season?
i really don't see where there was any reason for this
they did have a losing season [5–11]
but they did better than last year under holmgren [4–12]
i don't remember hearing any bad press about mora all year
he didn't cause any scandals or problems for the seahawks
there weren't any huge stories of coaching misconduct
and he seemed to be a decently likable guy
and unless you're an interminably unlikable person
[i.e. bill belichick or bobby petrino]
there's really no reason you should be denied that opportunity

joining the ranks of coaches fired before their contracts were up:
jim zorn [redskins] and dick jauron [buffalo]
i sort of understand why they let dick jauron go
the man's only had one winning season ever
and he's never been an overly impressive coach
but my complaint isn't with his termination
it was the fact that he was fired halfway through the season
you shouldn't do that EVER, under any circumstance
what motivation does the team have after that?
i don't think any coach is deserving of that
[barring some sort of violent megalomaniac]
besides, that kind of shakeup mid–season is really bad form
rebuilding is what the offseason is for
i honestly don't have much to say about jim zorn
i never really watched him coach
but, considering this was his first head coaching job
he should've at least been given his final year
shanahan's first two years with the rams didn't exactly go well, either
but look what he developed into
who knows, maybe zorn would've too
[for the record, i doubt it, but you still can't ever be sure]

adding to my frustration with these coaching changes comes this:
rumors that the lions will fire jim schwartz
which are mostly unfounded, for the record
i wouldn't put it past the lions to do that,
especially since they've shown how goddamn stupid they can be,
but i highly doubt they will
but, this brings up another issue i have with them:
firing coaches before their time is up
do you know who the only lions coach this decade to complete their contract it?
rod marinelli
rod fucking marinelli, who led them to the worst team record ever
he was allowed to complete his three year contract unscathed
they fired mooch and mornhinweg mid–season
and bobby ross resigned halfway through the season
wayne fontes was the last one to complete a season before being fired
also, fun fact?
the last coach to to not get fired or resign from the lions was don mccafferty
he only coached one season [1973], and then died after the season was over
in fact, as far as i've been able to research,
only one coach has ever left the lions on his own terms: dutch clark
he was actually the coach and quarterback for his two years,
and he retired at the end of 1938
how fucking sad is that? one coach retired, the other one died
the other 23 have been either been fired or resigned
i guess this means we can't really blame the current lions organization too much
they've been fucking stupid since the beginning
tell me, lions fans, does that make you feel any better?
cuz i wouldn't

i guess i can't bitch too much about this year's spate of coaching changes
it is, after all, better than last year's post season,
in which 11 teams changed coaches [which is fucking absurd]
sure as hell makes ya wonder which teams believe in franchise coaches
seriously, do teams even bother investing in long term staffs anymore?
here's a sampling of numbers of head coaches since the afc/nfc merger,
which was a scant 41 years ago:
detroit: 14
san francisco: 11
tampa bay [started 1976]: 8
philadelphia: 10
buffalo: 13
new england: 12
dallas: 7
new york [jets]: 15
new york [giants]: 9
cleveland: 14
indianapolis: 14
pittsburgh: 3

is it coincidence that pittsburgh's only had 3 coaches since 1970,
and also this list of achievements?:
most super bowl wins [6]
most conference championships [7]
most conference championships hosted [10]
most total wins [569]
best winning percentage
one of the biggest fanbases
one of the longest sellout streaks [299]
some of the best rivalries in the game
yeah, i didn't think so
teams like dallas, chicago, washington, denver, and miami can attest:
patience with and dedication to coaches produces the best results
if you want to be champs, you gotta take it one step at a time


universitas footballensis

i'm gonna go out on a limb here,
and through my hat into the ring of super bowl predictions
first, the afc:
ravens beat colts, chargers beat jets, chargers beat colts
i don't think indy has what it takes to beat san diego
they're way to sketchy going into the second half
but anyway, chargers as afc champs
now, the nfc:
vikings beat cowboys, saints beat cardinals, saints beat vikings
that's right, favre, you're gonna go belly up against new orleans
minnesota is way to predictable to win that game

so, my super bowl call is the chargers and saints
but, that's where my predictions stop [i know, i pussied out]
but, i dunno if i could call a winner in that matchup
those teams are pretty evenly matched,
and i think one team is just gonna get lucky at the end
yeah, it's cheap to not call the super bowl champs
but i don't see a way i could
now have at me


i'm actually gonna hold off on this until tomorrow
i was planning to do this earlier, but i didn't get to it til now
and i need to get up early [for me] for psych today
so, whoever you are, you're just gonna have to wait
i'm sure it won't be hard

but, to [hopefully] pique your interest,
i'm gonna bitch and moan about coaching changes
mostly the trend of firing coaches after one or two seasons
i might also go into universities sticking with short term coaches,
people who go four or five years then up and leave
but that's a big maybe

pete carroll signed with the seahawks today


football college

well, sad as it is, college football is now officially over
this year had a great bowl season
[as opposed to last year, which definitely didn't]
my predictions were also a lot better this year
i was 12–4 [last year was 1–6]

also, congrats to alabama
first heisman winner, a national championship, and an undefeated season
that's a hell of a year to have
roll tide


this kinda harkens back to my complaint about commentators
namely their very biased commentary
i'm not going to add to that rant
[that horse is already dead, why keep beating it?]
this is gonna bitch about their excuses for teams
mostly cuz it's annoying

when a good team has something unexpected happen to it
like losing a key player or coach
that person becomes the focal point of the entire game
all the commentators do is talk endlessly about it
and the end result invariably is this:
either they lost because of their problem
or they pulled it out despite of it
note the lack of credit for the other team

here's an example from today:
afc wild–card, part 2: ravens at the patriots
last week in houston the patriots lost wes welker
he tore his left mcl and acl
[which basically means he completely blew out his knee]
it was a season ender for him, at least
and hopefully not a career ender
but, welker was seen as one of the pats' key playmakers
so now, they were out their main wide receiver
oh lawd, what is dem patriots gon' do?

though, in the part of the game i watched, i didn't hear anything like that
i know that it's what's been thrown around in analytical circles
i've seen reports and heard commentating saying it
and in the end, the ravens schooled the patriots like only they can
which means, of course: the patriots lost because they lost wes welker
oh man, if they had welker for this game,
they totally woulda pulled it out, am i right?

this is the same kind of bullshit argument they made in the bcs bowl game
colt mccoy, all-american quarterback for the texas longhorns?
well, he got taken out 4 minutes into the game
he took a brutal shot to his throwing arm, which pinched a nerve
he even said it himself, his arm was completely numb
so, backup qb garrett gilbert played the rest of the game
and, for a backup, he was pretty impressive
[considering the pressure that was suddenly put on him]
but, throughout the game [and the ensuing days]
a lot of people seemed to put the brunt of alabama's win on mccoy
'oh, if mccoy'd played, things woulda been different'
'man, if colt hadn't been injured, texas would've won hands down'
yeah, football doesn't work like that

and, just for good measure, one more:
the jets beating the colts was a huge story
they played clips of painter being sacked over and over
and what was the gist of the analysis?
'oh, the jets got lucky because the starters were benched'
'indy would've drove their asses into the ground if peyton was there'
well, you know what? that's bullshit
the jets didn't upset an invincible powerhouse team without help
the colts have a terrible second–string group on offense
they obviously didn't bother practicing these guys during the week,
even knowing they'd be in to finish the game
that's just shoddy coaching

one person shouldn't [and doesn't] carry an entire team
losing a key player should not derail your performance
that's why there are second- and third-string players
to avoid having that exact situation happen
collapses happen because these backups are played enough
if you sit on a bench long enough, you're gonna get rusty
and that all falls on the coaching staff
gotta keep the whole team ready to go,
not just the eleven guys on the field
the real credit goes to every team that beats these teams
ravens, jets, alabama, everybody
they won because they knew how to exploit those weaknesses
the colts didn't lose, neither did texas or the pats
the other guys won
and that's all there is to it

getting back to alabama for a while
among their many accomplishments this year,
they achieved an unblemished record
that's right, the holy grail of every sport:
a perfect season
that's right, the lust in every sportsman's eyes
the secret [or not so secret] desire in all their hearts
and in american sports,
no sport is more obsessed with it than football

to date, there has only been one completely undefeated team:
the 1972 miami dolphins
they lead a clean sweep that year, going 17–0
for a long time, they remained the only team to have accomplished it
and then, along come the 2007 patriots
that year, they became the second team to have an undefeated season
they went 16–0 during the year, and then 2–0 in the playoffs
but, in what's probably the biggest upset this decade,
they lost the super bowl to the giants, ending their run at perfection

every year, teams make runs for perfection
sometimes they get close, sometimes excruciatingly close
but only one teams has ever gotten there
this year, there was a 'battle of the undefeateds':
the saints and the colts
they happened to be the only two undefeated teams for a while
they eventually both made it to 13–0
then the saints lost to dallas, and then the colts to the jets
both teams were criticized for their losses,
but the colts got the brunt of it
because they sat their starters

sitting starters at the end of the season is a long-standing trend
[and one i completely disagree with, by the way]
the rationale is that it will allow them to rest their key players,
and that this rest will allow them to do well in the postseason
usually only teams that are assured a spot do this,
but sometimes even questionable teams do this
[like this years broncos, for example]
these losses are waved off and overlooked
and then we get on with the playoffs

that is exactly what the colts did in week 16
the offensive starters played the first half,
and then we benched for the second half
even though they were winning respectably at halftime
they got beat down handily by the end
[that's more to do with the inexperience of the backups,
and definitely the coaching decisions, but i already covered that]
the colts were disappointed, sure
and the fans definitely were
but life went on
wait, no, that's a lie, no it didn't

following this loss to the 'less than deserving' jets,
the media was all over the coaches and players for their explanations
commentators complained, analysts 'rationalized', and fans bitched
why? because they're obsessed with getting a perfect season
michael irvin's one of them:
he said more than once that, to be able to get a perfect season,
he'd be willing to give up all three of his super bowl rings
ALL THREE? say it ain't so, mike!
what a jackass
what kind of fucking fruitcake says something like that?
three superbowl rings? most players don't even have one
he won three super bowls, how much more do you need?
christ on a bike, how fucking greedy are you?
perfection is not something you need to aim for
it's nice, sure, and it's history making,
but it's not something you should make deals with the devil for

perfection isn't something you attain
perfection is something you are rewarded with
it's the gift at the end of a ton of hard work
if you are truly deserving of being perfect,
than you'll achieve it
the 1972 dolphins very much earned it
the 2007 patriots obviously did not [and i'm so glad about that]
if your team truly is that good, than one day you'll have a perfect season
and if you aren't, suck it up and work harder

and now, let's return to this benching the starters bullshit
like i said, it's a trend that's been around for a long, long time
wanting to protect your most valuable assets is understandable,
especially if you're poised to do great things in the playoffs
why would you rob your players of their purpose?
these are multi–million dollar players,
and they aren't even playing games
what a fucking waste that is
if you're going to spend that much on a valuable commodity
why wouldn't you use it to its fullest extent?

i do understand long–term vs short–term goals
the playoffs and the superbowl are the ultimate goal
and the last few games, especially when they don't have an impact,
really are nothing more than going through the motions
especially when they're up against shitty teams
but that doesn't absolve you of fulfilling your duties
if a football team really is good, they'll play every game the same
they treat every opponent as worthy and every win as necessary
which team would you hold in higher regard?
a 14–2 team that lost two heartbreakingly close midseason games,
but pulled themselves together and finished the season strong?
or a 14–2 team that won the first 14 in a row
and then lost two blowouts, scoring 22 points to the opponents' 59?
i'd go with the first one

there are times i enjoy when teams do that
namely when i get vindicated in the playoffs
i've seen plenty of teams rest their starters the last two games,
go into their first playoff game ready and confident
and then lose, sometimes badly
[can you say philadelphia? because i can... PHILADELPHIA]
there really is nothing better than seeing that happen
where's all your rest and prep time now?
yeah, sitting out your last two games really helped:
instead of possibly clinching home field advantage,
or maybe even a first–round bye,
you head into the playoffs and loose to a wildcard team
ah... sweet, sweet vengeance

also, a final note on this week's wildcard weekend
philly and cincy both got shutouts last weekend
so this week, they faced the same teams in the wildcard
[dallas and the jets, respectively]
this time, neither team got shut out
but, they both got summarily destroyed throughout their games
jesus christ, cincinnati, what the fuck happened?
where the hell was the cincy that beat the shit out of the steelers?
what the hell, philly? where was trademark andy reid passing game?
neither of those games were fun to watch
because seeing teams get killed like that is no fun
[unless it's minnesota or the patriots, which leads me to...]

oh man, this one wasn't even close to the predictions
just to lay it out for all of you:
the patriots have never lost to the ravens in the postseason
they were playing at home in gillette stadium
they hadn't lost at home in the playoffs since 1978
they were seeded number 3, and the ravens at number 6
and, of course, they're the patriots
so how did the legendary patriots fare?
they gave the ravens a 14 point lead in only 4 minutes and 6 seconds
the pats had three turnovers [and baltimore scored off each one]
they missed their only field goal attempt
and, oh yeah, THEY LOST 33–14
god, that was a beautiful game to watch

of all the pregame talk, this was the best assessment:
'the difference is how these teams are gonna treat this game
the pats are expecting to win, but the ravens want to win'
how true, how true

also, as a final thought,
i'd like us all to think of the invariably un–classy head coach
that man being, of course, bill belichick
just think about all the shit he's pulled over the years
all the stupid, stubborn comments,
all the cheating controversy,
all the bad sportsmanship,
and, of course, all the bad hoodies with cutoff sleeves
[makes jim tressel's sweater vests look good in comparison, huh?]
now, with all that in mind,
think about the look on his face by the end of the game
that ugly frustration and resignation as they fell behind for good
it was great, wasn't it? yeah, it really was
makes me wish i could see it more often


football state university

as i look back on the michigan state/texas tech game
i realized how good our team can be
we played really well during this year's bowl game
granted, we didn't pull it out in the end
but watching them play was rejuvenating
we actually made plays, we actually made stops
we actually played competitively
and i'm tellin' ya, nobody pulls trick plays like we do
that was the kind of michigan state football i like to see
that's what makes proud spartans,
and that's what they need to do next year
whether they will or not is another story


there's one consistent thing i find annoying about football on tv:
the commentators:
they come in with very apparent biases
and they call the entire game that way
they make excuses when they falter
and they cheer them on when they're winning
and the opposing team never gets a chance
it's obvious to anyone who watches these games
and i think it's bullshit

there isn't a specific type of commentator that's guilty, either
former players/coaches and sportscasters are equally to blame
i don't how they make their picks week to week
but there's no excuse for it
i understand that everybody has favorites
and teams they don't like
but their job is to commentate the games,
not be pep squads for only one team
also, is it just me,
or do they never seem to cheer for the same team you do?
that's what makes it worse for me
i'm trying to watch the goddamn game,
and all i hear is how awesome everyone else is

i personally think the worst example of that was on sunday
during the michigan state/texas tech game
but it happens all the time
right now i'm watching the orange bowl
and the commentators have favoring georgia tech all night
granted, these guys have actually been giving iowa credit
but still, it's unfair to everyone to do this
they don't just do it in college either
pro commentators are just as bad, sometimes worse
need an example?
look at the vikings/bears game from week 15
all night long they were talking about the amazing brett favre
and how the vikings were the obviously dominant team
gave chicago shit all game long
and yet, chicago got the win

i would love to see some truly objective commentating
i think it would make the games so much better
but, that's never going to happen
i have a better hope, one that might actually happen:
since you can watch games online now,
and cable providers are making games more intuitive
i'm hoping they have selectable audio tracks
and that you can eventually turn off commentating
and all you'll hear is the qb calling the plays
the sound of pads colliding, players grunting,
and the whistles blowing
a guy can dream, can't he?

of all the controversial things about college football
nothing surpasses the bcs
since its inception, it's been hit with criticism [and with some praise]
the rankings, it says, is based on a scientific formula
it's more accurate and balanced than the ap, coaches', and harris polls
and it offers equal opportunity for high status
but, against it, there's been all sorts of contention
it's biased against smaller, less powerful conferences
it doesn't actually provide scientific results
and so on and so forth
i'm not going to argue against that [not now, at any rate]
personally i don't like the bcs
but for a different reason:
the bowl games themselves

[also, my congratulations to iowa
they just won the orange bowl 24–14 over georgia tech
congrats, hawkeyes
this puts the big ten at 4-3 in bowls this year]

there are currently 34 bowl games
in the words of marshall lucky in used cars
'that's too fuckin' high!'
how many goddamn post season games do these guys need?
i know that football is the highest grossing ncaa sport
but come the fuck on
they have to reach down to 6–6 teams to fill these games out
[like michigan state and minnesota]
and some teams don't even have winning conference records
[like arkansas]
how is that fair?
how can they reward teams for failing like that?
most of those games aren't well patronized
for example, the little caesar's pizza bowl:
marshall and university of ohio
they play at ford field in detroit, a stadium that seats 65,000
how many people went to the bowl? a paltry 30,331
doesn't sound that exciting, does it?
i got a better idea

not unlike joe paterno, i'd advocate a playoff system
here's how i would handle it:
there are currently 11 division 1 conferences and 3 independent teams
[the indys are army, navy, and notre dame]
each of the 11 conferences would play a conference championship
each conference champion would gain a playoff berth
[along with the #1 independent team]
and there would be no automatic home field advantage
[games would be played at the higher record team's stadium]
the eight highest [by record] conference #2s, including indy #2,
would be given wild–card playoffs the first week of postseason
the 12 champs and 4 wild–card winners would then start the playoffs
there'd be three rounds, then a championship game
including the wild–cards, there'd be 19 games in the post season
[30 including the conference championships]
it may not be much, but the turnouts would be huge
i think it would create a much more interesting bowl series

yes, i am aware that this system has flaws
i know it draws heavily on the nfl playoff system
and i know that i don't lay out a ranking system
but, i think my system has a lot more potential
not every team gets to go to a bowl game every year
it'll give teams more drive to earn it
that is what the post season is about, after all
earning a place above everyone else

another thing i have against the bcs is their locations
the vast majority of these bowl games are in the south or west
the only northern ones are in detroit and boise
what possible reason can they have for that?
the weather? that's bullshit
the bcs claims they choose neutral arenas for bowl games
and to their credit, they technically do
the places they chose, more often that not,
are right in the back yard of teams playing in them:
idaho played in boise, miami played in orlando,
georgia played in miami, ucf played in st petersburg,
unc played in charlotte, texas tech played in san antonio,
usc played in san fran, and i could go on and on

since there's no hope of reforming the bcs
[not in the immediate future, at any rate]
i think they should scatter the bowl games
you want a neutral playing field?
how about putting the alabama/texas game in minneapolis?
how about usc and bc in kansas city?
how about ohio state and oregon in new orleans?
those are just specific examples, but they can be generalized
move some of these bowl games to the north
teams worried about playing in the cold?
make them in domed stadiums, i don't care
but i don't think they should anyway
make these cold weather teams play in the cold winter air
if they go pro, they're gonna have to anyway
we shouldn't cater to them

you wanna know how pussy southern football players are?
watch the 'cold weather' games from this season
at the wisconsin/miami game, it was 50º
the miami players were shivering and gathering around the heater
they were all wearing gloves and long sleeves
the wisconsin players? no sleeves, no gloves
and they kicked miami's ass
and the commentators? [hey-o, look, it's them again]
excusing miami's poor play 'because it's cold'
same thing in the iowa/georgia tech game
same thing in the penn state/lsu game
poor southern teams were feeling a little cold,
and couldn't play as well as normal
big ten players have that weather from october on
if we can take it, so can they
so suck it the fuck up, guys, and play the goddamn game

all i wanna see, sometime before i die,
is a better college postseason
so please, bcs, get it together
fix up your shit, get your stuff together
fire those fucking commentators
and show me some good goddamn football


the university of football

i had a first today, and i think it's worth sharing:
i got so angry at football commentators that i started to scream
i have never, EVER, in my life
heard college commentating as bad as the msu/texas tech game on espn
honest to fucking christ
they sounded like texas tech paid them off to be complimentary
they were fuckin sucking ruffin mcneill's cock on the airwaves tonight
talking about how hard texas tech's had it this week
only mentioned dantonio in passing,
completely marginalized our entire team
only complimented us a record five times
at one point they ever referred to it as the 'controversy bowl'
i wish i could get my goddamn hands on them,
because i'd love to fucking wring both of their necks
they're a disgrace to commentators, and that's saying something
because commentators always suck

i'm starting a posting theme today
it'll continue for as long as i feel like
i'm basically going to be ranting about football [pro and college],
because i feel like letting it all out
so, if you don't like football or don't like my rants
feel free to check back in a week or so


i will never understand the way coaches handle staff changes, ever
because it's always handled so poorly
and it makes me question their loyalty and integrity

first up to the plate tonight is brian kelly
brian kelly, once upon a time, coached for cmu
he started in 2004, with very limited success
he put in the effort, and in 2006 they won the mac championship
they headed off to the motor city bowl
kelly resigned his post to accept the head coach job at cincinnati
a post left vacant by the departure of mark dantonio
as he leaves, kelly states he will not coach cmu at their bowl game
[they did win, by the way]

he spends the next three years at cincinnati
and by all accounts, it was an amazing tenure
in his first two years, cincy had only six losses
in his last year, they were completely undefeated
they ranked #3 in the bcs, and were invited to play in the sugar bowl
but, surprise surprise, kelly wouldn't be there
after PUBLICLY STATING that he would stay at cincy,
kelly accepted the head coaching job at notre dame
and guess what? he wouldn't coach cincy in their bowl game
this was kelly's first bcs game ever
it was his opportunity to pummel the florida gators on national tv
but, being brian kelly, he passed on it
now he's preparing to turn around the ailing notre dame program
who wants to bet he bails on them in three years too?

congratulations brian kelly
you've abandoned two teams you helped push to success
you've basically left an entire university high and dry
AFTER you publicly promised you'd stay there
[shades of bobby petrino, anyone?]
ALSO, during their loss to florida yesterday,
i heard a commentator talk about you during the second half
saying you were the 'biggest cincy fan out there',
and that it 'broke your heart to not be on that sideline'
you abandon your team, and still come out looking like a good guy?
you are officially an asshole

[it's worth noting, too,
that kelly had great success at his first coaching job,
grand valley state had .725 winning percentage under him
they won four conference championships
and were national champions in division II his final two years
obviously the man is very talented
he just doesn't appear to have a soul]

on deck, we have urban meyer
everybody has heard about the urban meyer thing by now
everybody who follows college football, at least
on boxing day, he announced he was resigning from the florida gators
he'd ignored his health too long, he said, and his family was suffering from it
he'd had a great tenure, and it would be hard for him to let go of his boys
everyone down in florida was gonna miss him,
and it threw a lot of questions into the air about his successor
the next day he took it back
the very next day, after a 'spirited practice', he retracted his resignation
instead, he said, he'd take an indefinite leave of absence
and he would leave the team in the hands of his offensive coordinator
better yet, he basically said he'd come back this coming season
he said he felt in his gut he would come back

all that took place over about 26 hours worth of time
all before the bowl game on new year's day,
in which they resoundingly destroyed cincinnati
[by the way, you could see the disappointment in their faces
every cincy player just looked defeated from the very start
i'm amazed they even bothered to keep playing till the very end]
i don't question the validity of meyer's condition,
being a head coach of a team like that is extremely stressful
why make that announcement before the end of the season?
what good does that accomplish?
all it does is monopolize the media coverage solely on your team
i didn't hear jack shit about kelly after that, not once [cept in the game]
all it does is disingenuously make you seem like a flawed hero
and it absolves the team on accountability of any potential collapses
if florida won, it would be a bittersweet sendoff
if florida lost, it was because they lost their longtime friend and mentor

urban meyer, i call bullshit on your sincerity and motives
a true friend and mentor lets his guys play their hearts out
and he does it without crushing them before they do it
he doesn't drop a bomb on them a week beforehand,
and then reneg on it the next day
make up your goddamn mind before you open your mouth
i hope your health clears up, and i wish you no ill will
but don't pull this shit again
it's contemptible, and it's beneath you

next on my list, we have florida state university
despite whatever press they've released on the matter
they basically forced bobby bowden out the door
and they did so in the worst possible way
bobby is the sole person i'm not mad at on this [first] list
he'll go down as one of the best college coaches ever
he's a legend, and he's in a class of his own
which is why you never do to him what they did

back in early october, i read an article on espn
the fsu trustees chairman called on bobby bowden to retire
said the current system with the 'coach-in-waiting' wasn't working
and that bowden was past his prime, and needed to go
now, i don't care who you are or what you do
you do NOT dictate orders to a man like that
bowden's career put fsu on the national stage for good
he took what bill petersen did, and took it a huge step further
he created what we now know as the florida state seminoles
he's the second highest all-time winningest coach ever
he's tied for the most winning seasons ever
not a college football fan in the country doesn't know his name
why would you ever try to force that man out?

this isn't to say i don't understand their reasoning
bowden's success rate this decade hasn't matched their past
you can't measure the present on the past, not in this respect
you can't expect to be national champions every year,
you can't expect to be conference champions every year,
and you can't expect to win a bowl game every year
yes, his record this decade was 85–44 [.659]
and yes they 'only' won five bowl games this decade
[including his final win yesterday against his alma mater, west virginia]
but that's not the success you should measure him by

the man is a huge draw to fsu football, and the university in general
he is the epitome of what it means to be a seminole
he has absolutely earned the right to go out his way
that doesn't mean he should go as long as possible
we've all seen what happens when a coach just doesn't know when to quit
he said it himself this year:
he wanted to stay one more year, and that was it
how could they not grant him that?
if it's a losing season, then you don't need to say anything
he'll know he doesn't have it anymore, and he'll say goodbye
but if you come out and win big all season, what a great sendoff
you'll have a huge turnout every game
you'll have a great season [which will end in a bowl game]
and if you win a bowl game [maybe a big one],
what a great way to hang up your big ol' hat
but now we'll never know

THAT is how you let a coach end his life on the sidelines
you don't piss and moan about his rocky start in public
you don't bitch that his successor is having a tough time in public
and you don't fucking call for his retirement in public
fsu should be ashamed of themselves for how this was handled
bowden's retirement was definitely on their terms
i don't care what they say to the contrary
he was forced to retire before they were forced to fire him
[which would've killed the admin, no question]
he could've fought it, sure
he could've flat out said 'no', like paterno did in 2004
but that's just not his style

farewell, bobby bowden
may you enjoy your retirement longer than bear bryant did
seminole faithful with always remember what you did for them
and to florida state, the spineless seminoles atop the totem,
you are officially assholes